What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
The stages of Christmas Shopping: 1. Plenty of Time 2. Oh no
What's Santa's favorite chips? Crisp Pringles!
Everyone keeps asking me if I'm ready for Christmas. No, Rachel, I'm not even ready for today!
What do you call a snowman that can walk? Snow mobile
How do you keep your hands clean over the holidays? With Santa-tizer
Looking at my kids' Christmas lists, they really think this mommy gig pays well.
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve!
What goes “Oh, Oh, Oh”? Santa walking backwards!
What’s every elf’s favorite type of music? Wrap!
Christmas is the best because I can shout, "Don't come in here!" and my kids assume I'm wrapping their presents instead of just wanting to be left alone.
What's every mom's favorite Christmas carol? Silent Night!
How is Christmas exactly like your job? You do all the work and some guy in a suit gets all the credit.
What did one ornament say to the other? I like hanging with you!
What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?
What does Santa say when he get's stuck in the chimney? Ho, ho Heeellllppp!
Not to brag, but I have a talent for predicting what's inside a wrapped present. It's a gift.
What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson!
What do grapes sing at Christmas? 'Tis the season to be jelly.
What's Red, White, and Blue? A sad candy cane!
The Mom's 12 Days of Christmas: 12 trips to Target, 11 "Mom, I'm hungry"s, 10 "Frozen" re-runs, 9 burnt Christmas cookies, 8 failed family photos, 7 sibling fights, 6 party invites, 5 primal screams, 4 "Crap, we're late"s, 3 bottles of wine, 2 Christmas pageants, and 1 sobbing call to my mom!
Tell us which joke you think is the funniest in the comments below and take an extra 15% off your next purchase over $25 with discount code XMASCUTIE1 from now until the end of the year!